For as long as I can remember, I've known myself to be constantly passionate about two things in my life. Creativity and writing. When I wasn't writing, I was doing something crafty. My school notes in elementary school always had little doodles in the margins and I was always getting into trouble for drawing when I wasn't supposed to. I later learned that I could make my school notes into their own work of art.
To this day, I have stacks of notebooks filled with story ideas or even just ideas in general. It wasn't long before I decided that I wanted to do something with writing and being creative. As I got older, I settled on journalism. There's a practicality to it and it's a good way to improve writing skills.
Choosing a career in journalism won't take away my need to be creative and as I get older, I decided that I want to do other things that are artsy.
Right now, I think artistic soap and building terrariums are a super cool way to be creative. It could even be an extra way to make money. The same thing with the bracelets that I've learned to make over the years. They're in high demand too. It's something I've considered to be a potential way for me to make money for the fun things I want to do in life.
Almost all the time, I find myself questioning if journalism is what I really want out of life. I once explained the prospect of going out and getting stories as feeling like I'm in a pit of doom. To be fair, that's what it's like having anxiety. When I'm nervous about something, I fall back into that pit of doom. Journalism is a wonderful field, but sometimes I wonder if it's what I want to do for my whole life.
This past little while, the pit of doom seems to be a little worse and I blame my recent breakup. When you get bad news that seems to come out of nowhere, the world can seem a little darker. A little crueller. Especially when you thought that things were going to turn out differently.
My family can attest that I thought my life was going in a different direction. One where I spent the rest of my life with this person. But he didn't seem to feel the same way. And that's okay.
It hurts now, but it's going to make me a stronger person. And potentially cause some acne because I'm using cake to eat my sadness away. I can definitely recommend eating cake.
This breakup gave me a bit of a focus too. Do something that'll keep me away from the boys. At least that's what I'm hoping for. There's no guarantee when it comes to my boy-crazy brain.
But now I'm looking to making my soap. It's an extra way to make money and something that I find to be super relaxing. I know it sounds like a super strange hobby to have, but I've never been one to want to be normal. It's just not who I am.
Eventually, I plan on selling it, so keep an eye out for that. I'm just waiting for them to finish curing.
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